Stick This, Stick Figure Window Decal Insanity

I am not a great admirer of Stick Figure Families on the rear windows of vehicles.  I’m a bit of a cynic and I think there are too many unsavory people in the world today just looking for opportunities to inflict harm and wrong on others. Sue me.  I think having a description of all the members of your family on the back of your car or truck or whatever gives these types of people too much information.  Let’s see what I mean…

OK. Here we have a dad that likes to fish, a mom that likes to shop, a son that is a soccer player, a daughter that is full of team spirit, and the baby who is king of the household.  The cat and the dog, which looks like a small type of dog finish this picture off.  Suppose I’m a thief and see this on your car and follow you home, what am I going to be afraid of?  Getting snared with a fish hook or smacked in the face with a soccer ball while dad and son are being rooted on by their daughter and the dog yips and yaps?  I think not.
stick fAMILY BBQ
Pregnant woman, Dad at the BBQ and two pussy dogs.  One even has a bow in its hair. Dad’s probably half loaded and by the time the burglars break in too drunk and full of steak to roll over his wife, who you know is freaking out,  and those worthless mutts are cowering under the bed. Plenty of time to snatch your TV at least before pops even gets his eyes unglued.  Pregnant mom is a liability all on her own.  You know she’s going to be too concerned about baby-to-be and the future to want hubby to confront anyone.
cat familyDo I have to say anything here at all???
Or here for that matter.  These folks are too fat to do much of anything except go to the store to buy more butter.
biker family
Normally I would say worry about bikers, most of the ones I know you don’t want to jack with in any way, shape or form, but these aren’t real bikers, these are wannabe’s.  All this tells me is someone has some shiny new bikes at home and if they have shiny new bikes, they probably have a lot of other shiny new things.  I would be a little bit afraid though of a dog and a cat that could handle any type of moving vehicle.
These people ought to be fairly safe from anyone with any ideas towards robbery.  With that many kids they probably can’t afford too much other than clothes and food.  You notice the mom and the girls are all wearing clothes that are the same pattern?  Mom’s having to make their clothes out of her old ones.  If they did have anything worth stealing though they’d probably never hear you break in, as they would probably be too busy manufacturing child number eleven.
I would think this might be six of one a half dozen of the other unless you find the vehicle parked in an urban area. If so these are just people that like to garden on the weekends and their son is in 4H at the local high school and keeps his horse in a stable.  You’d have to watch out for that rake, although I’m sure it’s not kept next to the bed as a weapon. They’re probably too tired from digging in the dirt all day though to put up much of a fight against any intruders.
Crooks probably wouldn’t pay much attention to this as a potential score as anyone that’s just come back from Disneyland has blown their wad there.  That’s not to say though that if these people can afford to go to Disneyland that they can’t afford other nice things too, so it’s sort of a toss up.
This has got to be my absolute favorite though.  Just the two of us here with plenty of money. I wonder if they keep a safe in the house for all that dough?
I don’t care WHO you are, if you’re stupid enough to follow someone home with any criminal intent that has this on their ride you deserve whatever you get.
And there you have some of my reasons for not liking Stick Figure Families.  Of course my perceptions are probably skewed and there is absolutely no one checking YOUR stick family out to see if you’d be an easy target.

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